Never fear, Orlando is HERE!

I had a beloved poster in my classroom back in the States. My students knew not to go ANYWHERE near it. They knew it was precious to me.

It all started as a joke my first year teaching. I met a group of students at the theaters so we could all watch The Fellowship of the Ring together. As you know, Orlando played Legolas. After fake swooning every time he appeared on screen, a student had had enough. He said, "Could you cut it out? Leg-o-Lamb isn't that great! He has long blonde hair for Pete's sake! He looks like a girl."

I could tell it really bothered my student that I thought someone girly looked so hot. (Can you tell I love getting reactions out of my students?) So I thought I'd "adopt" him as my #1 Hollywood guy.

That's the story of how Orlando "walked" into my life. Or how I'd describe to my students that Orlando, with his superbly elfish abilities, shot an arrow straight into my heart. And ever since then, he has been my fake boyfriend. You see, middle school students want to know all the time if you have a boyfriend, or if you're married, or if you're talking to someone. Their lives, especially eighth graders', are built around relationships. It is hard for them to understand if you're not in one. So I decided that every time they would ask me, I would turn the situation into a humorous one. I would point to the poster and matter-of-factly say, "Maybe you know him? His name's Orlando. Orlando Bloom." That would get giggles, and the moment would be over.

Of course, some of my students began to think I was serious. I think they thought I really had a thing for him. (Who could blame them? I did joke around a lot.) I began to get posters from my students from teeny-bopper magazines with Orlando in a sexy pose. This put me in a difficult situation. I didn't want to shrug off their "gift"; I also didn't want to tape it to the wall and look like some kind of obsessed freak! Usually I would say, "Thank you so much! I'm going to take it home with me!"

And then the day came when I used Orlando as an ultimatum. You might remember this post. And worse was the day when I had to tell him goodbye. It was more than saying bye to a poster. I felt like I was leaving memories.

But you didn't actually think that I'd move to a whole new country without him, did you? Nosiree...I bought a new poster and put it up. The tradition continues.